For splendor and celebration, a Greek wedding
is hard to beat. The regal trappings of the bride and groom
make every couple King and Queen for a day. The delicious traditional
foods and jubilant music are sure to delight all in attendance.
Some traditions are tied to the Greek Orthodox faith that is
shared by an estimated 98% of the native Greek population; others
originate in antiquity or are culturally-centered. Whatever
their genesis, Greek wedding traditions can bring history, drama
and excitement to a wedding celebration.
Here are some elements you might want to incorporate:
Ancient Tradition
Early Athenian marriages were arranged, and the bride's
family would secure a match by a gift of land, money, or other
riches. The dowry would be displayed on the couple's marriage
bed, and those who visited the household were expected to make
their own financial contribution.
Although weddings might occur at any time of the year, it was
thought that marrying during a particular season or month might
engender a special blessing. For example: January was reserved
for celebrating Hera, wife of Zeus and defender of women. Brides
who married in January were thought to have her special protection.
January was also a month for fertility celebrations, so these
brides were doubly blessed. Ceremony announcements were delivered
by hand, along with candy wrapped in red paper, or a flower.
The other key participants in the wedding ceremony were the
koumbaro (best man) and the marauders (ushers). If the bride's
father was not forthcoming with the expected dowry, the groom
and his attendants would kidnap the bride and negotiate with
her father for her return. Traditionally, the koumbaro was later
asked to serve as godfather for the new couple's first born
child.
The bride would carry herbs or grains as a fertility rite, and
at the wedding celebration, the new couple would eat a cake
made of honey, sesame seeds and quince to symbolize their commitment
to one another, through good times and bad. The parents would
witness the marriage ceremony, then escort the couple to their
new home in a procession led by young girls playing music and
singing.
Updating Those Traditions For Today
The paying of a dowry is no longer common, but many modern
couples and their families choose to include symbolic gestures
to represent the practices of old. A Greek or Greek-American
bride's family or friends might celebrate by throwing money
on her bed for good luck. One Greek-American bride's attendants
made her bed with gold and silver satin sheets for her final
night's sleep as a single woman, to show her how much they treasured
her.
To add that traditional Greek element to announcements or invitations,
you might include a floral motif, or use the color red in some
fashion. Placing dried flower petals in the envelope, like confetti,
adds an informal, festive touch. And today's Greek or Greek-American
bride might still choose to schedule a January wedding. Even
a modern woman can use a little help from Hera. Some Greek or
Greek-American grooms conspire with their male attendants for
a pre-wedding "kidnapping" of the bride -- whisking
her off to a nice dinner with her future husband and his attendants.
What bride wouldn't enjoy an evening as the center of attention
of all those men?
A contemporary bride might have her florist include sprigs of
fresh herbs in her bouquet, to honor the old fertility rite.
Rosemary, thyme, mint and basil are especially fragrant. At
the wedding celebration, a couple might have a small cake, or
a single small tier of their cake, made of those traditional
ingredients -- honey, sesame seeds and quince -- for a ritual
tasting. Those couples who plan to spend their first night "in
town" are sometimes escorted to their room by their parents
and young family members, who serenade the newlyweds to the
threshold of their suite.
Celebrate With Your Friends
The pre-wedding celebrations are typically characterized
by the same revelry as the Greek wedding reception. That might
include wedding songs or nifikatos. Among the most popular is
"Simera Gamos Ginetai," which translates to "Today
We're Having A Wedding." The rehearsal dinner or reception
feast might include such delicious dishes as:
Dolmathes -- a traditional Greek appetizer of grape leaves stuffed
with a rice, dill and mint mixture
Kapama -- a traditional dish of lamb simmered in onions and
tomatoes, with cinnamon and savory flavors
Moussaka -- an eggplant and potato layered dish (similar to
a lasagna) with beshamel sauce
Spetsiota -- a baked fish dish with garlic, tomatoes and lemons
Spanakopita -- a spinach and egg pie with a filo crust
The celebration is likely to also include lots of fresh wine
and Ouzo -- a clear, anise-flavored liqueur served on the rocks
or with water.
The Greek Orthodox Celebration
In the Greek Orthodox church, marriage is a Sacrament. It
begins outside the church doors, where the rings are blessed
and exchanged. This portion of the service is called the Betrothal.
In the Betrothal, the first instance of a blessing in threes
is performed. The repeating of blessings three times occurs
through the service -- symbolically representing the Holy Trinity
of Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
The priest then leads the couple into the church to stand in
front of a platform, on a white cloth. Behind the couple, a
wedding icon is carried in the processional. The couple is given
lighted candles, which they hold throughout the service. The
Sacrament of Holy Matrimony is performed, followed by three
prayers.
At this point, the dramatic Crowning occurs. Crowns, or stefana
are placed on the head of the bride and the groom, echoing the
Biblical reference to God bestowing His blessings in the form
of crowns, and in recognition of the couple's roles in the Kingdom
of God. The crowns might be floral in nature, like a wreath,
or can be made of any of a number of materials, from porcelain
to metal. Prior to being worn by the couple, they are placed
on a tray of almonds at the front of the church. The crowns
are often connected by a ribbon, representing the couple's eternal
bond. The bride and groom exchange their crowns three times.
After the ceremony, the special almonds are given to single
women, who are told that if they sleep with the almonds under
their pillow, they will dream of their future husband.
The ceremony continues with readings and the sharing of the
communion cup. The priest then takes the groom's arm and leads
him and the bride around the wedding platform three times. They
are thus united as husband and wife.
Sweets and Favors
While today's Greek or Greek-American bride might decide
to order a western wedding cake, she might also want to ask
her mother (or another Greek woman in her life) to make diples
for the occasion. These fried pastries originated in Sparta
and are made from honey and nuts, and are displayed on a special
table with the main wedding cake. Guests are in store for a
little sweetness too: they traditionally receive candied almonds
called koufeta. The white-shelled almonds are thought to symbolically
represent the sweet and bitter in life. At a Greek-American
wedding celebration, the sweets might be bundled up in white
tulle and tied with a sky blue ribbon, to represent the blue
and white colors of the Greek flag. Be careful to count out
an odd number of almonds for each bundle -- it is thought to
bring the guests good luck.
Dance Through The Night
There is perhaps no more memorable element of a Greek wedding
celebration than the dancing. It begins with the kalamatiano,
a traditional handkerchief dance, which originated in Peloponnesus
and Roumeli. The bride and groom dance together, connected only
by the scarf or handkerchief that each holds by an end. Eventually,
they invite others to join in the dancing, which can go on for
hours. As the celebration escalates, revelers may begin breaking
plates. A couple who anticipates plate breaking might want to
plan ahead and have something other than the caterer's pricey
china at hand. Stop by a thrift shop or restaurant supply store
and get some used dishes for the moment. And if you are attending
a Greek or Greek-American wedding, be considerate, and don't
pick up a plate unless it's clearly meant to be thrown.
A Lifetime of Sweetness
The Greek tradition also has a number of beautiful rituals
for blessing the home of a newly married couple. The Peloponnese
break a plate on the doorstep of the home to ward off evil spirits.
In Sparta, it was thought that carrying a piece of iron into
the home would make the marriage strong. Those who are eager
to start a family should crush a pomegranate under their heel
-- an ancient fertility rite from Chios -- and for a lifetime
of sweetness together, the newlyweds should feed each other
honey.
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